It’s cheesy all right .Personally I would develop this song in a nice synthpop song where I would keep the rythm and the main synth melody and add a realistic bassline and electric guitars and go from there
the squirrel has moves! who knows…these kind of fun videos may go viral .
I’d have to agree with the others-simple and clear.The music is important.The video part is the job of our customers.
You have an impressive protofolio!
This track yould be glithy,tech and experimental.With a simple cut it can be made 30-40 seconds long.http://audiojungle.net/item/almost-communicating/7025143
Best wishes and good luck finding the right track!
from a quick listen both versions have a little problem with the bassline-in the first the bassline is pretty harsh to my ears and in the second the harshness dissapears but there is too much low frequency and it gets disturbing,It is like the bassline takes the whole melody and main instruments like piano or bells are put in the back.Try playing more with an EQ and get the frequencies coexist.
On the other hand the song has a nice melody.
if it is held there are 50/50 chances that it gets accepted or rejected.Maybe the song isn’t exactly on the reviewer domain or genre and he\she needs another opinion. Good luck!
it sounds good to me at my speakers-maybe the bassline is too deep ;try to listen to laptop speakers or something similar and hear what it sounds like